Someone recently left a comment on one of my posts that had me thinking..... does everyone think that El Capitan and I don't talk?
Lol.... he wishes! hahahahahahaha
Seriously, El Capitan and I talk every day.... usually three or four times a day. On the Friday that I put the sign out, I sent him a text message it said, "All systems are a go Houston.... "
By 5 o'clock that night I was calling him frantic with the phone ringing off the hook with TV camera's outside our house.... from that VERY FIRST interview request - I *called* El Capitan to ask him what I should do.... I think we can *all* see that I have a 'face for radio' as they say - and I'm obviously *not* 'camera ready'. We were both surprised by the interest and thought that first interview would get the house on the evenings new which would help us sell the house -and - we *thought* that the media interest would end there.
THAT can officially go down as the first time I was most definitely WR.ONG. lololol
After that, we immediately agreed what *I* would say and what I *would not* say to the media.... about the kids, their names, his name, where he works, who Yoga Girl really is... etc.
Imagine that.... *not only* am I cleaning up the emotional mess that El Capitan's affair has left our children in... but faced the internet picking my Shamu-sized ass to pieces - El Capitan *asked* me not to reveal Yoga's Girls secret home-wrecking identity (I'm fairly certain she has a cape super tall stripper shoes to match).... which he didn't even have to ask me to do - because I already knew that I wasn't about to ruin her life.... though I briefly entertained the idea of throwing her less-than-slender carcass to the wolves to help save my own.... I thought better of it. I even texted her reassurance of that and asked her to take down her facebook page (or *at least* make her pictures private)... which she still hasn't done. I guess I'm more worried about her than she is.....
How's *that* for irony, Alanis Morrisette?
I actually haven't accepted - or turned down- a single interview without talking to El Capitan about it FIRST. Who was asking, what they wanted to talk about... etc. El Capitan doesn't like Dr. Phil.... so that was hardly even a conversation - and I declined politely. That doesn't mean he dictates what I say - or that I have some kind of "script" - but we have a general understanding of where the line for our family is and I haven't crossed it yet..... (nor do I plan to).
To be frank.... I didn't start the BLOG before I talked to El Capitan first.
On top of the media frenzy (that again - we were totally unprepared for!) - there's my emotional pain where it sometimes seems that the only thing left to dry my tears are Yoga Girl's wet sheets.... but alas, it's late and we'll avoid going down that road.... (or laying down on that bed as the case may be...... - which, I *might* add that it's super FANTASTIC to know EXACTLY where you husband threw away his family.... the hunter green of her comforter - her affinity for movies and photography..... people *really* shouldn't post their ENTIRE lives on facebook.... or pictures of their bedroom. lolol.)
Anyhow.... on top of all that - there is still the daily life of the children - which El Capitan has been apart of - from visitation that fits within his work schedule to phone calls about EV.ER.Y.THING. "Daddy I went pee in the potty..... Daddy I lost a tooth..... Daddy I went swimming today......".
When The Girl fell off the bar stool and busted her lip - my first phone call was to El Capitan to let him know she got hurt. When The Boy had the runs..... I phoned El Capitan so that he could plan something different for the next days time together just in case The Boy was sick.
Like I said... I'm pretty sure El Capitan wishes I didn't call as much as I do ... lol. The divorce papers *say* I have sole and primary custody.... which means I can make decisions about EVERYTHING without asking anyone. However... when I wanted to change the home school program for The Boy, I first called El Capitan to say that I wanted to do it. *THEN* after he agreed, I looked into which changes to make - THEN, after presenting the ideas to El Capitan - a decision was made.
An no... it's not some kind of rouse to "get him back" - ..... whatever I *may think* of El Capitan's parenting skills at the moment and regardless of what any paper says (with all due respect to our Judge) - it still feels wrong to me to make choices that affect our *family* and our *children* without talking to their Father first..... even if I could insert a few other less than stellar adjectives in place of 'father' right now... bwahahahaha. :)
So, it doesn't matter if El Capitan's EX WIFE is mad or sad or angry or hurt...... if there's something that's come up with the kids - a hurt knee, a change in doctors, a reason to go to the doctor - no matter how benign - El Capitan is the first phone call I make...... not because I actually *want* to hear his voice.... but because deep down - I know it's the *right* thing to do.
So .... as Uncle Phil always say's, I "Just Do It". Period.
Today's big triumph calls to Dad - were The Girl going all day without an accident and he got to see a video of The Boy dropping in on the 9 foot bowl at skate class. Whatever my thoughts are about El Capitan.... my kids *still* need two cheerleaders in the stands and I'm not about to let them miss out on that.
As far as life goes..... our divorce states that El Capitan will be invited to attend their birthday parties, to opening presents on Christmas morning, to... everything. It states not that he is "welcome" to attend recitals or sports events - but rather that he is *expected* to attend them - we both are. Period. I have *countless* divorced friends who disagree with this - but.... my kids *still* believe in Santa - and I'm not about to ruin the magic of the season because El Capitan got his mistletoecaught in someone else's camel toe. teehee heee...
Two Whole Children from ONE Broken Home. That's the goal. That's been my goal since I first found out about Yoga Girl.... it's a lofty goal... one that will still come laced with anger and tears and pain - on both sides.... but that doesn't mean it isn't attainable. It doesn't mean that after a a few rough days or weeks - that's a goal I'm ever going to give up on..... because if I give up that goal - then I really just give up on my children and THAT - I'm never going to do.
Oh.... and one more thing. The same poster felt that I'm holding Yoga Girl accountable - and unduly so.... but here's the deal: Yoga Girl KNOWS who I am. She's seen me - MANY TIMES, knew me to be El Capitan's WIFE and the mother of his children. She has also STATED to me that she doesn't see "anything wrong" with what they did.... because she was - and wait for it because THIS. IS. AWESOME: she was "saving him from a situation where he felt like sh*t every day.......".
lolololololololololololol. Remember - I did mention the possibility of a cape and stripper shoes.... Yoga Girl could start her kind of "In-Justice League". Their slogan could be "Fighting For the Freedom of Put-Upon Spouses"... and ..... "Freeing Forlorn Spouses One Sexual Indiscretion At a Time"......bwahaha
Somehow.... I don't think El Capitan is feeling "less sh*tty" these days... hahahaha. Mission NOT Accomplished... hahaha.
As for me... I have a wee girl who has woken up crying for Mommy.... and that's the only cape I
Lol.... he wishes! hahahahahahaha
Seriously, El Capitan and I talk every day.... usually three or four times a day. On the Friday that I put the sign out, I sent him a text message it said, "All systems are a go Houston.... "
By 5 o'clock that night I was calling him frantic with the phone ringing off the hook with TV camera's outside our house.... from that VERY FIRST interview request - I *called* El Capitan to ask him what I should do.... I think we can *all* see that I have a 'face for radio' as they say - and I'm obviously *not* 'camera ready'. We were both surprised by the interest and thought that first interview would get the house on the evenings new which would help us sell the house -and - we *thought* that the media interest would end there.
THAT can officially go down as the first time I was most definitely WR.ONG. lololol
After that, we immediately agreed what *I* would say and what I *would not* say to the media.... about the kids, their names, his name, where he works, who Yoga Girl really is... etc.
Imagine that.... *not only* am I cleaning up the emotional mess that El Capitan's affair has left our children in... but faced the internet picking my Shamu-sized ass to pieces - El Capitan *asked* me not to reveal Yoga's Girls secret home-wrecking identity (I'm fairly certain she has a cape super tall stripper shoes to match).... which he didn't even have to ask me to do - because I already knew that I wasn't about to ruin her life.... though I briefly entertained the idea of throwing her less-than-slender carcass to the wolves to help save my own.... I thought better of it. I even texted her reassurance of that and asked her to take down her facebook page (or *at least* make her pictures private)... which she still hasn't done. I guess I'm more worried about her than she is.....
How's *that* for irony, Alanis Morrisette?
I actually haven't accepted - or turned down- a single interview without talking to El Capitan about it FIRST. Who was asking, what they wanted to talk about... etc. El Capitan doesn't like Dr. Phil.... so that was hardly even a conversation - and I declined politely. That doesn't mean he dictates what I say - or that I have some kind of "script" - but we have a general understanding of where the line for our family is and I haven't crossed it yet..... (nor do I plan to).
To be frank.... I didn't start the BLOG before I talked to El Capitan first.
On top of the media frenzy (that again - we were totally unprepared for!) - there's my emotional pain where it sometimes seems that the only thing left to dry my tears are Yoga Girl's wet sheets.... but alas, it's late and we'll avoid going down that road.... (or laying down on that bed as the case may be...... - which, I *might* add that it's super FANTASTIC to know EXACTLY where you husband threw away his family.... the hunter green of her comforter - her affinity for movies and photography..... people *really* shouldn't post their ENTIRE lives on facebook.... or pictures of their bedroom. lolol.)
Anyhow.... on top of all that - there is still the daily life of the children - which El Capitan has been apart of - from visitation that fits within his work schedule to phone calls about EV.ER.Y.THING. "Daddy I went pee in the potty..... Daddy I lost a tooth..... Daddy I went swimming today......".
When The Girl fell off the bar stool and busted her lip - my first phone call was to El Capitan to let him know she got hurt. When The Boy had the runs..... I phoned El Capitan so that he could plan something different for the next days time together just in case The Boy was sick.
Like I said... I'm pretty sure El Capitan wishes I didn't call as much as I do ... lol. The divorce papers *say* I have sole and primary custody.... which means I can make decisions about EVERYTHING without asking anyone. However... when I wanted to change the home school program for The Boy, I first called El Capitan to say that I wanted to do it. *THEN* after he agreed, I looked into which changes to make - THEN, after presenting the ideas to El Capitan - a decision was made.
An no... it's not some kind of rouse to "get him back" - ..... whatever I *may think* of El Capitan's parenting skills at the moment and regardless of what any paper says (with all due respect to our Judge) - it still feels wrong to me to make choices that affect our *family* and our *children* without talking to their Father first..... even if I could insert a few other less than stellar adjectives in place of 'father' right now... bwahahahaha. :)
So, it doesn't matter if El Capitan's EX WIFE is mad or sad or angry or hurt...... if there's something that's come up with the kids - a hurt knee, a change in doctors, a reason to go to the doctor - no matter how benign - El Capitan is the first phone call I make...... not because I actually *want* to hear his voice.... but because deep down - I know it's the *right* thing to do.
So .... as Uncle Phil always say's, I "Just Do It". Period.
Today's big triumph calls to Dad - were The Girl going all day without an accident and he got to see a video of The Boy dropping in on the 9 foot bowl at skate class. Whatever my thoughts are about El Capitan.... my kids *still* need two cheerleaders in the stands and I'm not about to let them miss out on that.
As far as life goes..... our divorce states that El Capitan will be invited to attend their birthday parties, to opening presents on Christmas morning, to... everything. It states not that he is "welcome" to attend recitals or sports events - but rather that he is *expected* to attend them - we both are. Period. I have *countless* divorced friends who disagree with this - but.... my kids *still* believe in Santa - and I'm not about to ruin the magic of the season because El Capitan got his mistletoecaught in someone else's camel toe. teehee heee...
Two Whole Children from ONE Broken Home. That's the goal. That's been my goal since I first found out about Yoga Girl.... it's a lofty goal... one that will still come laced with anger and tears and pain - on both sides.... but that doesn't mean it isn't attainable. It doesn't mean that after a a few rough days or weeks - that's a goal I'm ever going to give up on..... because if I give up that goal - then I really just give up on my children and THAT - I'm never going to do.
Oh.... and one more thing. The same poster felt that I'm holding Yoga Girl accountable - and unduly so.... but here's the deal: Yoga Girl KNOWS who I am. She's seen me - MANY TIMES, knew me to be El Capitan's WIFE and the mother of his children. She has also STATED to me that she doesn't see "anything wrong" with what they did.... because she was - and wait for it because THIS. IS. AWESOME: she was "saving him from a situation where he felt like sh*t every day.......".
lolololololololololololol. Remember - I did mention the possibility of a cape and stripper shoes.... Yoga Girl could start her kind of "In-Justice League". Their slogan could be "Fighting For the Freedom of Put-Upon Spouses"... and ..... "Freeing Forlorn Spouses One Sexual Indiscretion At a Time"......bwahaha
Somehow.... I don't think El Capitan is feeling "less sh*tty" these days... hahahaha. Mission NOT Accomplished... hahaha.
As for me... I have a wee girl who has woken up crying for Mommy.... and that's the only cape I
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