Which is fine... I'm happy to defend my fat ass *anytime*.... I'm also happy to let it drop. (like it's hot!)
In the mean time - my days have moved on.... suffice to say I wasn't exactly sitting in my garage with the door closed and the car running just because a fat-ass like "Mr. Leykis" doesn't find me attractive. lol
To be blunt: I've been called worse by better people.
Really.... I have.
The thing is - like most people - I don't actually being insulted by the masses for how I do (or do not) look.... I actually do have feelings in spite of what my sense of humor and generally good attitude would suggest. This time, however, I had to consider the source... so it didn't upset me nearly as much as it could have.
Also.... I'm kicking ASS at this losing weight thing... I'm down 56 pounds now - and keeping it off.... I've lost two pant sizes, two bra sizes (damn) - and inches alllll around. Woohoo. The pressure is on to lose *at least* another 30 in time for summer... so we will see. I *promise* pictures and a post about how I'm doing it will come soon - but I don't want to post it in response to some Internet Troll.
Things are going pretty well with El Capitan - he had the kids today and they had a blast... which makes me *really* happy to hear. The Boy is still struggling from time to time with some things... but just this morning he told me this: "You know what Mom......? Mom - I'm glad we get to see Dad today because my heart is growing more all the time for him......"
How f*cking awesome is that? It sucks to have to "fall in love" with your Dad again... but I'm just grateful that we're all in a place where that is happening AND that he hasn't had to suffer through a lot more crappy stuff before it did. Cyber high five to me..... thank you very much.
Low five to the ex, too...... he's been really good about working about the school schedule and my work schedule and even taking the kids a few times so I can go out with friends. I think that's pretty nice of him.... also - he has yet to miss a child support payment - so as far as *many* other single Moms are doing.... this is pretty aces right now.
I know it won't always stay this way.... I know that eventually the high will return to a low and life will shake, rattle and roll.... but we survived the earthquake.... the after shocks just can't possibly hurt that much. lol
At least I f*cking hope not.
I've been focused on making some new friends... not replace my current friends - but single friends to go dancing with and stuff like that. I've met a few people off and on... but I'm always surprised at how... broken so many of us are in our 30s and 40s.
I keep thinking that *I* should be the one with the issue's - with the hang-ups, with the trust issue's..... but I'm not. I'm ready to rock... lololol. Other people... not so much. Sometimes I worry a bit... seems to me like more people spend time living in their past instead of finding a new road and a new adventure. How tragic..... life goes by far too quickly to waste time on rehashing what didn't work out yesterday: learn your lessons, pick up your paper dolls and moooooooove on.
Speaking of...... I'll probably epicly jinx it... but I might have a real-live date for Saturday... we'll see. I never like to put eggs in baskets and stuff like that.....
Get this though - *super* nice - and "warned" me that they have a tendency to be a bit "too honest" and sometimes people get annoyed.... um, yeah: you're good there. lololol
Sweet to be worried about that, though.... in fact, seemingly rather sweet all around.
And cute... very cute. So at the very least... the view should be nice. hahahaha
Now that we are fully in the one year period - I do worry on how to start talking to the kids about the possibility of me actually "dating" (not in reference to said cute, sweet person above) - but just generally speaking. I should think that there are a few books on the Kindle I can download...... yes?
Because The Boy always knew about Yoga Girl- it was never something we talked about... I kind of just realized that. Wow... Mother of The Year over here. Seriously though.... it's been an accepted fact that Daddy has a girlfriend.... we never talked about what that meant, or what it was.....
Hmmm.... that's probably not good.
Looks like I have a weekend of heavy reading to get started on.... finding a way to help the kids understand that new people will come (and possibly go) - and how they can learn to have relationships with new adults in our lives.....
To be honest..... it sounds sucky. lolololol