Just like our last trip to the LA area, it's not possible to come here and not visit all the usual places I went to when I was a kid - so when the kids and I drove to pick up Grandma in Burbank, our next stop was lunch at Bobs Big Boy in Taluca Lake.
It's one of the original Bob's - and features a working car hop. The Bubbie used to work here decades ago and The Boy has taken on my love of collecting Bob's Big Boy piggy banks... so the kids always ask to come here when we get Grandma.
Sadly.... while Grandma has been the wisest of people in our family extoling advice and Jewish guilt like a true pro..... she is fading fast. She's been having chest pains and other issue's - and perhaps the saddest thing is her memory loss...... Our lunch goes like this:
Gma: Did you drive down....?
Me: Yes - it took 17 hours, we stayed with Noni.
Gma: Who.....?
Me: Noni - Mom's best friend since gradeschool......?
Gma: Oh - did you drive down?
Me: Yes, we drove down from Portland.
Gma: Did you get a hotel room on the way down?
Me: No, we stayed with Noni.....
This goes on and on for 15 minutes or so until she changes gear:
Gma: Do you still have your house?
Me: No, remember we had to sell it.....?
Gma: Why did you have to sell it?
Me: Because El Capitan and I got divorced.... remember?
And.... then we talk about that for five minutes until ten minutes I get:
Gma: So how is the house......?
Sigh.......
We continued on like this through lunch, repeating the same conversations over and over and over to the point where The Boy was starting to look at me weird. The Girl was engrossed in her chocolate shake and even though The Bubbie and I had discussed not telling my Grandma about my 'newfound' Lezzie status.... I though -f*ck it - she can't track where I live - surely she'll forget this in record time.... right?
We'll see about that...... lololol
The thing is, I've never lied to my Grandmother. I have always adored my Grandparents and respected them and would never lie to them about anything., so when we were on our third go around of - "We sold the house, El Capitan cheated, we are divorced......"
Grandma asked me, "So.... do you have a boyfriend now?"
I thought about what to say. The Boy looked at me with an eyebrow raised and I could tell he was a bit confused. I could hear The Bubbie in my head telling me that upsetting Grandma at this stage of life was a bit unfair and what not (she has a small point) - but...... to honor that meant lying.
I won't lie to my Grandma. I'm not ashamed of who I am - nor am I ashamed of who my girlfriend is (Hail Mary for those of you who missed it :) - and I sat there at the table eyeing my strawberry lemonade and I thought - she's asking me about the person who cares deeply about me - who has a genuine and willing interest in my kids and a life together..... is it ok to disrespect this person and lie?
And so after she asked again I said..... "Actually Grandma, I don't have a boyfriend but I do have a girlfriend."